Yesterday I was just minding my own business, watching TV, when my emotions were assaulted by a Zillow commercial. This isn’t the first time this has happened to me.
The first time was with the Zillow commercial with the father in the military. They show him talking to his wife about different houses over the phone. You had no idea he was in the military until the end of the commercial when he surprises his family in their new home. Reduces me to tears every single time. It’s ridiculous! Basically, any video that involves a member of our Armed Forces surprising someone they love makes me lose it. It’s pathetic. See exhibit A below.
So onto yesterday’s emotional breakdown. I was watching what appeared to be a mini-marathon of Property Brothers on HGTV with the hubby. We were sitting there eating our macaroni and cheese (it was homemade, not from the box….this time at least) for dinner, when it happened. A Zillow commercial comes on with a husband holding a tray of breakfast food and discussing his home search with his wife. He stated how when they were looking for a home they wanted to make sure they had enough bedrooms for the children they would one day have and wanted to be sure they were in a good school district for their future children. He continues to walk up the stairs and brings the food to his pregnant wife in bed.
Cue the waterworks! I looked at my husband and I said “OMG! I’m crying?!”. He looked at me like I was crazy but I couldn’t help it. That commercial was our life exactly. When we were searching for our home, we made sure to find a house with at least 3 bedrooms and in a good school district (Hubby was biased and really only wanted to look within the school district that he teaches) for our future kiddos. We planned, we thought about raising our kids in a home and wanted the best possible option we could find for that within our budget. Yet the kids never came for us like expected.
When you go to start the future that you imagined, you don’t expect it not to happen. You imagine kids in your future. You expect to be able to have kids. You don’t consider the fact that it may be difficult for you. That’s not even a thought that crosses your mind. But for us, that’s what happened. We bought our family home and we have been unable to fill it with a family. We have two extra bedrooms, one is a guest room but the other one is completely empty (it was my husband’s video game room until we finished the basement now he has moved downstairs). We bought our home 2.5 years ago expecting to have a child by now but that isn’t what happened.
Infertility hits you in different ways. For me yesterday, it was a Zillow commercial that completely described our lives at one point. All of things we thought about when we went to purchase a home were discussed but unlike the people in the commercial we have been unable to accomplish that task of having a child to raise in the home we chose.