Everything Happens for a Reason….yeah, right

This is something you hear a lot when you are a part of the pregnancy and infant loss community.  It’s something said by others (or even ourselves) to help offer some comfort for the loss you experienced.  I am guilty of this myself.  When I had my miscarriage last year, I justified it to myself … Continue reading Everything Happens for a Reason….yeah, right

Advertisements

30 day Writing Challenge for Stillbirth Mothers

A fellow blogger, Sanda of Little Heart Tiny Wings, wrote a daily writing challenge for mothers of stillborns.  I have been participating in this challenge in my personal journal, but figured I would post some of the responses here for the whole month because a lot of them have photos (and I love photos!).  I … Continue reading 30 day Writing Challenge for Stillbirth Mothers

6 months

Six months ago, Asher Ray came silently into the world.  Six months ago, was the first and only time I was able to hold my son. Six months ago was the only time I was ever able to kiss my son.  Six months ago I said "hello" and "goodbye" to my child.  Six months ago … Continue reading 6 months

Anxiety

This week has been filled with anxiety for a variety of reasons.  I had a dentist appointment on Thursday, something that always gives me anxiety. I hate the dentist. I’m always afraid they are going to find a cavity and that gritty polish makes me gag. The crunch of it just goes through me. I … Continue reading Anxiety

29

Today is my 29th birthday.  The last one before the big 3-0.  I have had absolutely no desire to celebrate this day.  As I have gotten older, birthdays have become less and less exciting.  27 was not good to me.  I struggled with infertility and had a miscarriage.  I faced a lot of fears that … Continue reading 29

5 Months

Today marks month five of living without my son. When I think of the fact that it has only been 5 months and that I have a lifetime to go without him, my heart breaks and tears immediately spring to my eyes. How? Why? The unfairness that is this life is ridiculous. I’ve found that … Continue reading 5 Months

Strong

Since losing Asher, I have heard this word quite frequently. For example, I was having a conversation with a coworker who works in another department the other day.  I don’t see her often and this was one of the few times I was able to speak to her since being back at work.  The conversation … Continue reading Strong